Meeting 2. - “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect”

Tags: Vocation, Spirituality, Maturity, Text work, Group work, Discussion, Formative

Goal of the meeting and introduction for the animator

The goal of this meeting is to find or start finding “elements of oneself” that make up personal spirituality - the charism of life. It is important that at the end of the meeting everyone leaves with the awareness that God has placed in them their unique and unrepeatable vocation and only they themselves can discover and realize it in themselves.

A large role in this meeting should be played by the animator’s testimony about the personal path to faith. It is not about some spectacular miracles, but more about experiencing everyday life in faith and about individual elements of spirituality.

There are many questions and exercises in the outline. The animator’s task is not to “realize the outline” to fit everything at all costs, but to choose those questions which according to him are most important for the group.

Prayer and sharing

Let us start the meeting with prayer and sharing what has happened so far at the retreat. Let us pay special attention to yesterday’s evening prayer and today’s conference.

• What did I particularly experience?

• What was difficult? What did I not understand?

• What did I take from these contents for myself (inspiration, resolution)?

When I was a child, I thought like a child

My formation

At the morning conference we touched upon the topic of growing in faith and Christian formation. Let us consider for a moment how we can relate these contents to our life history.

• What has formed me so far?

• What does my formation look like now?

• How would I like my formation to look like?

(One can list here the influence of parents, grandparents, friends, teachers, animators, priests, religion lessons, altar server meetings, Marianki, oasis, ministry, books, movies, catecheses on YouTube, weekend retreats, summer retreats, liturgical workshops, etc.)

• Am I satisfied with how my formation looks like?

• What is particularly important to me?

• What am I missing? What do I need to work on? What is needed for me?

Example comes from above

Let’s read short biographies of famous people who formed themselves before us

Note

one can distribute one card to each participant and everyone will tell about “their” saint or choose 2-3, read aloud and discuss together

St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross (Edith Stein)

was born in 1891 in Wrocław as the eleventh child of deeply believing Jews. Although the rules of religion were zealously observed at home, Edith at the age of 20 considered herself an atheist. In 1911 she passed her maturity exam with excellent results and undertook philosophical studies in Wrocław. Two years later she went to Göttingen, and began writing her doctorate. Work on it was interrupted by the outbreak of World War I. Edith volunteered for the Red Cross, became a nurse and began helping those with infectious diseases. After half a year of work, completely exhausted, she was released from sanitary service. In 1917 she obtained the title of doctor of philosophy. In 1921 her conversion took place thanks to encountering the autobiography of the mystic and doctor of the Church, St. Teresa of Avila. She then asked for baptism and on January 1, 1922 received baptism and First Holy Communion. In 1934 she received the Carmelite habit. After the novitiate she took religious vows and took the name Benedicta of the Cross. At that time National Socialism covered the whole of Germany with its range. Teresa, realizing that her Jewish origin could pose a threat to the monastery, moved to Echt in the Netherlands. During the mass arrest of Jews she was arrested by the Gestapo and interned. Then she was deported to the camp in Auschwitz, where she died in 1942.

John Paul II (Karol Wojtyła)

was born in Wadowice. Already in childhood he was involved in the life of the parish, he performed the duties of an altar server with dedication. He began his education in the gymnasium in Wadowice, in 1938 he undertook Polish studies at the Jagiellonian University, where he showed great activity – he took part in literary meetings, participated in the preparation of performances, wrote his first poetic works. In 1942 Wojtyła decided to study theology in the secret Metropolitan Seminary in Kraków. In 1946 he received priestly ordination. The following years in Karol Wojtyła’s biography are already a period of intensive theological work, cooperation with Catholic magazines (including “Tygodnik Powszechny”) and climbing subsequent rungs in the church hierarchy. In 1958 he was appointed bishop, in 1963 archbishop, and in 1967 he received the cardinal nomination. After the death of John Paul I in 1978, the second conclave elected Karol Wojtyła as the new pope. The Pole took the name John Paul II, and his pontificate lasted over 26 years and was one of the longest in history. The Polish pope also had a great influence on the changes that took place in Europe at that time, including the fall of communism. The Polish pope was known as a great supporter of ecumenism and a pilgrim – he made 104 pilgrimages (visiting 134 countries around the world), including as many as 8 to Poland. He died on April 2, 2005.

Faustina Kowalska (Helena Kowalska)

was born in 1905 in Głogowiec. Saint of the Catholic Church, proclaimer of the cult of Divine Mercy. She was born in a large family, her father Stanisław Kowalski and mother Marianna née Babel, were farmers. She started school in Świnice Warckie, but did not even finish three classes. A desire appeared in her to give her life to God by going to a convent, which met with categorical opposition from her parents. In 1924, without their consent, she went to Warsaw and joined the Congregation of the Sisters of Our Lady of Mercy, taking the religious name Faustina. At the persuasion of her confessor Father Michał Sopoćko, Faustina began to keep a detailed record of her experiences, which had the character of revelations, thanks to which the image of Jesus I Trust in You was created and the feast of Divine Mercy was established. She died in 1938.

Francis

was born into the family of a wealthy merchant Pietro Bernardone. His mother gave him the name John at baptism, which he later changed to Francesco. He attended the parish school at the church of Saint George — where he obtained basic education. He participated in the war between Assisi and Perugia, as a result of which he was imprisoned in Perugia for betraying a comrade. He was released in 1204 due to serious illness. In the church of San Damiano he heard the voice of Jesus Christ speaking to him from the cross. He decided to live in penance; he restored the chapels: San Damiano, San Pietro and the chapel of Our Lady of the Angels in Portiuncula near Assisi. He led a life in solitude. He also helped lepers. He gathered companions with whom he preached ideas of love, purity and poverty. He died on October 3, 1226.

Stanislaus Kostka

was born probably in December 1550 in Rostkowo near Przasnysz. When he turned 14, together with his brother he was sent to a Jesuit school in Vienna. A year later he fell seriously ill. St. Barbara appeared to him then with two angels. The saint brought him Holy Communion. In the second vision he saw the Mother of God, who places the Child Jesus in his hands. The next morning Stanislaus Kostka got up completely healthy. Parents did not allow the boy to join the Jesuit order. Then Stanislaus Kostka left Vienna in hiding. His older brother set off in pursuit of him. Stanislaus reached Bavaria, more than 600 km away from Vienna. From there Peter Canisius sent him to Rome. He was accepted into the novitiate. At the age of 18 Stanislaus Kostka took religious vows. In the same year he died of malaria.

Mother Teresa of Calcutta

actually Ganxhe Agnes Bojaxhin, was born in 1910 in Skopje, then Yugoslavia, today Macedonia. Her mother raised her in the Catholic faith. Agnes from early years was fascinated by the lives of missionaries and their ministry. At the age of twelve she decided to dedicate her life to God. At the age of 18 she decided to become a missionary and joined the Institute of the Blessed Virgin Mary. She took religious vows on May 24, 1931, taking the name Teresa. In the second half of the 40s she founded the Congregation of the Missionaries of Charity, which in 1956 obtained the status of an order. It dealt with helping the blind, lepers, disabled, incurably ill. In India and many other countries, thanks to Mother Teresa’s initiative, about 50 homes for abandoned children were established, and in 1985 in the USA the first center in the history of the world for AIDS patients was established. She died in September 1997.

Jerzy Popiełuszko

was born on September 14, 1947 in the village of Okopy near Suchowola in a family of farmers. He was an altar server and stood out for his deep religiosity. He received First Holy Communion and confirmation in the same year – 1956. In the years 1961–1965 he attended high school in Suchowola. He was diligent, but studied averagely. Because of his religiosity, his parents were summoned to school. After graduating from high school, he discovered a vocation in himself, and entered the Higher Theological Seminary in Warsaw. In the 70s he performed pastoral ministry in parishes; Holy Trinity in Ząbki and Our Lady Queen of Poland in Anin and Infant Jesus in Żoliborz. From 1980 he was associated with the social movement “Solidarity”, in which he served as chaplain. Fr. Popiełuszko’s activity did not please the then authorities, he was repeatedly interrogated, received many letters with threats. On October 19, 1984, uniformed militia officers stopped the car in which Father Jerzy was traveling, and kidnapped him along with his personal driver, who eventually managed to escape. On October 30, the body of the priest was fished out of the Vistula Lagoon near Włocławek. In December 2009 Pope Benedict XVI signed a document stating the martyrdom of Fr. Jerzy, and in June 2010 a beatification mass took place.

Karolina Kózka

was born in the village of Wał-Ruda near Tarnów in 1898. Her parents owned a small farm. She worked with them on the land. She grew up in an atmosphere of living and authentic faith, which was expressed in common family prayer in the evening and at meals, in daily singing of the Little Office, frequent reception of sacraments and participation in Mass also on weekdays. Their poor cottage was called a “little church”. Relatives and neighbors often gathered there for common reading of the Holy Scripture and religious magazines. Her uncle, very religious and involved in apostolic and social activity, had a great influence on Karolina’s spiritual development. In her parish she was a member of the Temperance Society and the Apostleship of Prayer and the Archconfraternity of Perpetual Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament. She died in the 17th year of life on November 18, 1914, at the beginning of World War I. A Tsarist soldier abducted her by force and bestially murdered her when she defended herself desiring to preserve virginity. After several days, on December 4, 1914, her body was found in a nearby forest.

• What connects these people? How do they differ?

• Why do we remember them? Why are they worth remembering?

• What does this give us? Are we to be the same?

• What connects us with them?

Each of these people is a known saint/blessed. They reached holiness each in their own way. Their paths were completely different, but the Church recognized each equally as a model to follow. Each of them had to start from something, even they started their path from learning the basic truths of faith, and only later under the influence of their experiences, own reflections and the influence of other people, they themselves began to consciously shape their spirituality.

The beginning of every path is common to all, each of us starts learning from the same things. One cannot specialize in any field without knowing the basics of the Polish language or mathematics. Every child in kindergarten and initial grades of primary school learns the same thing in the same scope, basic skills such as reading, writing, counting, are common to all. In faith it is the same. We start by learning commandments and most known prayers by heart, not from contemplative prayer. However, one cannot stop at this stage!

• Which of the learned “basic” elements of faith do I currently consider most crucial for my life? Who and when passed them on to me?

People differ from each other, so it is impossible that the spirituality of each of us will be the same. Developing one’s faith, at a certain moment of one’s faith each of us discovers ever new elements and aspects of it.

Let’s imagine what our spiritual life would look like if we used ALL the proposals offered to us by the Church. We wouldn’t have a single day off, because every day there would be a different meeting or service. We would always have a breviary, rosary, scapular, and several different types of prayer books with us. Such religious life would be not only tiring, but above all harmful, that is why it is important to discover and choose something of one’s own, one’s charism of life.

Note

To the animator! Of course, the matter must be put clearly: I cannot resign from the Eucharist, but I can choose whether I prefer the Way of the Cross, rosary, adoration, or breviary. I cannot resign from the teaching of the Church, but I can choose whether on YouTube I listen to Szustak or Jesuits. Or I don’t listen at all, just read encyclicals.

Charism of life

Magnanimous gift

Let us consider what a charism is? Let’s read the passage:

Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. All these are empowered by one and the same Spirit, who apportions to each one individually as he wills.

—1 Cor 12:4-7.11

Let’s ask:

• What is this “common good”?

• Since the Holy Spirit acts as He wills and gives everyone different gifts, what influence do we have on what and how we will do in life?

The noun “charisma” comes from the verb charidzomai, which means: to do something pleasant for someone; to do a favor; to give, offer something willingly, kindly, joyfully. The ending -ma expresses the product, effect of this action. Hence charism means “magnanimous gift”, “present”.

Let’s list the types of charisms we know (let’s not enter into conversation here, let’s treat it as an introduction by the animator to the concept of “charism of life”).

• general charisms - e.g. gift of salvation, universal call to holiness

• special charisms - gift of prophecy, gift of tongues, gift of healing, etc.

• religious charism - “Religious charism is what makes a given order itself, and not another order”.

• charism of life - analogously: what makes me be myself in faith, and not someone else. :)

Communion of Saints

How can one recognize the charism of life? - exercise.

Quotes of various wise people - we spread them out in front of everyone and everyone chooses those that best fit their faith. (IMPORTANT! All these quotes are wise and true. It is not about choosing those with which we AGREE, but those that are “ours”, that best fit our heart. Please also do not enter into psychoanalysis here. ;)).

• Workers in the Lord’s Vineyard should stand with only one foot on the ground, and keep the other raised [and ready] to set off on the way. (St. Ignatius of Loyola)

• Science and faith, reason and religion are called to purify and heal each other, they need each other and must acknowledge this mutually. (Benedict XVI)

• To foresee [and plan] what is to be done, and after doing it to examine it [and evaluate] – these are the surest principles of good action. (St. Ignatius of Loyola)

• Faith is a courageous, risky step of our freedom beyond the narrow circle of what is guaranteed by evidence. (Fr. Tomáš Halík)

• The world, in which there is so much noise, so much confusion, needs silent adoration of Jesus hidden in the host. (Benedict XVI)

• With You, for You and in You we desire to sanctify this day, so that our modest effort may praise God with joy. (Liturgy of the Hours)

• God is joy, that is why He put the Sun in front of His house. (St. Francis of Assisi)

• If you want to find the source, you have to go up, against the current. (St. John Paul II)

• I do not want rest in the fight, but I will fight to the last breath of life for the glory of my King and Lord. I will not lay down the sword until He calls me before His throne; I do not fear blows, because God is my shield. The enemy should fear us, not we the enemy. (St. Faustina Kowalska)

• Each of you, young friends, also finds in life some Westerplatte of your own, some dimension of tasks that must be undertaken and fulfilled, some just cause for which one cannot but fight, some duty, obligation from which one cannot shrink, cannot desert. (St. John Paul II)

• Let no one who comes to you leave without feeling that they have become better and happier, everyone should see goodness in your face, in eyes and in smile. (St. Mother Teresa of Calcutta)

• Today you are a small flame, but thanks to God’s grace you can become a burning torch, carrying the light of the Gospel and the warmth of your mutual love and friendship to all compatriots. (St. John Paul II)

• Looking at the world, we do not see heaven, but everywhere we can see traces of God: in the structure of matter, in the entire rationality of reality. (Benedict XVI)

• A Catholic should not therefore impose his religious convictions on others, but should support rational discourse. (Benedict XVI)

• God can only love. God loved us before we loved Him. Loved with such eternal love we sense that our answer consists primarily in relying on Him. (Br. Roger of Taizé)

• Let us learn to rid ourselves of the illusion that we can give God some name by which we would sufficiently praise and exalt Him. He is above names and ineffable. (Meister Eckhart)

• Idleness is the enemy of the soul. (St. Benedict)

• Whoever did not fight for relationships, is a bastard. (Fr. Jan Kaczkowski)

• If you comprehend him, he is not God (Benedict XVI)

• Don’t be a Christian because you have to. Because you were raised that way. Because others are. Because such is the tradition. Be a Christian because you choose so. (Adam Szustak OP)

• God has divided our life very well, intertwining periods of joy with times of seriousness. (Bl. Pierre-Giorgio Frassati)

• And we, overcome with love and full of great fear, let us beg the Lord for help when a hostile blow threatens us. (Liturgy of the Hours)

• O become, Jesus, for the soul the joy of eternal Pascha and join us, raised by Your power, to your retinue. (Liturgy of the Hours)

• Mighty Ruler, faithful God, in your hand you hold the fate of the world, you adorn the morning with the splendor of the sun and give warmth in the middle of the day. (Liturgy of the Hours)

• The joy of the Gospel fills the heart and the whole life of those who meet Jesus. Those who allow themselves to be saved by Him are freed from sin, from sorrow, from inner emptiness, from isolation. (Francis)

• God himself implanted in the human heart the desire to know the truth, the ultimate goal of which is to know Him himself, so that man — knowing Him and loving Him — could also reach the full truth about himself. (St. John Paul II)

• O cold soul, why do you not burn? My heart, why do you not tremble all over? Your Jesus sheds blood in abundance from fiery love. (Lamentations)

• O sweetest of Guests, sweet joy of hearts, sweet refreshment. In work You are coolness, in heat living water, in weeping solace. (Sequence Veni Sancte Spiritus)

• Loving brings down to the ground very much. And if it is really loving, it never feeds on ideas. Because loving someone always comes down to washing, cleaning, forgiving - to such very tangible things. (Adam Szustak OP)

• God, who brings comfort, even if we completely do not feel Your presence, You are. Through the Holy Spirit, although invisible, You are always with us. (Br. Roger of Taizé)

• We can live our whole life in fear and crouching or be upright and proud. (Fr. Jan Kaczkowski)

• You can argue with another, quarrel, even get angry at him, but you must not despise him. (Fr. Jan Kaczkowski)

Let’s ask:

• What did I choose? Why?

• With what traits/skills/approach of mine can they be associated?

Faith is very individual. Not in the sense that we are to keep it to ourselves and show it to no one and tell no one about it, but that it is a personal relationship with another Person, and there are no two relationships in the world that would look the same. I will not read “my” faith in a book, I will not copy it from other people, regardless of how holy they might be. I must discover myself what is closest to me, who I am before God.

Faith is not to limit, impose commands and prohibitions, nor is it to make man unhappy, force him to act against himself. Spirituality and vocation are so that man feels completely happy and fulfilled, realizes himself living in accordance with God and His commandments. Fulfills God’s plan for himself, creatively using everything that God has placed in his heart. Not because “one has to”, but because he wants to, because he knew Love so great that all good deeds flow from It.

Let us be perfect!

Let’s read the passage:

I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, But grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ’s gift. Therefore it says, “When he ascended on high he led a host of captives, and he gave gifts to men.” (In saying, “He ascended,” what does it mean but that he had also descended into the lower regions, the earth? He who descended is the one who also ascended far above all the heavens, that he might fill all things.) And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

—Eph 4:1.7-16

Let’s ask:

• What does it mean “to walk in a manner worthy of the calling”?

• [It is about], so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes.

What do you understand by these words?

• What calls for myself do I read in this?

Let’s read a fragment of the apostolic exhortation of St. John Paul II Christifideles laici.

We can conclude by quoting a beautiful text of St. Francis de Sales, a great promoter of lay spirituality. Speaking of devotion, that is, of striving for Christian perfection or of “life according to the Spirit”, he presents in simple words the vocation of all Christians to holiness, and at the same time specific forms of realization of this vocation: “God creating the world, commanded plants to bear fruit, each «according to its kind» (Gen 1:11). Similarly, he commands Christians, who are living plants of his Church, to bear fruits of devotion appropriate to the state and vocation of each. A nobleman is to practice devotion differently, a craftsman or servant differently, a prince differently, a widow, maiden or married woman differently. And that is not enough. It is also necessary that each individual adapt the way of practicing devotion to his strength, activities and duties (…). It is an error contrary to faith, downright heresy, to want to banish devout life from the soldier’s camp, from the craftsman’s workshop, from the court of princes, from married life. I admit, Philothea, that for purely contemplative, monastic and religious devotion there is no place in such vocations, however, apart from these types of devotion there are others, capable of perfecting people living in secular professions (…). Wherever we are, we can and should strive for a perfect life”.

—John Paul II, Apostolic Exhortation Christifideles laici

Let’s ask:

• What is devotion according to the author of the text?

• What is vocation according to the author of the text?

• “It is also necessary that each individual adapt the way of practicing devotion to his strength, activities and duties”.

  • What is this supposed to consist of in today’s times?

  • What does this mean for me?

According to St. Paul, the author of the Letter to the Ephesians, the goal of growing in faith is: “until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ”. Francis de Sales speaks similarly, identifying devotion with striving for perfection: “we can and should strive for a perfect life”. The Evangelist Matthew says in turn: “You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Mt 5:48).

One cannot be satisfied with half-measures, one cannot take the easy way out. To achieve something, to reach happiness, our effort and commitment are needed. In the text above, the author encourages constant development in faith, constant searching and going into the deep to the measure of one’s capabilities and “appropriate to the state and vocation of each”.

Note

At this moment we encourage animators to give testimony about effort and being oneself in faith.

My place in faith

Charism of life is a present placed by God in me for others. It is not to be wasted or kept only for oneself. It consists of many small elements, gifts from God, character traits, skills, desires, which only combined together give a full picture.

Below are prepared a few questions that can bring this closer to us. There will be no time to share all of them, so we propose that each person in the group choose 2-3 and share them. The rest can be read and left for reflection at the evening prayer.

• What is my approach to faith? (intellectual, emotional, contemplative)

• What spiritual experiences are close to me? (silent adoration, community prayer with singing, parish service)

• What could be my life motto? It can be a quote from the Holy Scripture, some quote or motto composed by oneself.

• How do I make decisions? How much time does it take me?

• What kind of person do I want to be in 5 years? What kind was I 5 years ago? What is changing in me?

• What gifts, skills, talents do I have?

• Who inspires me? What kind of people am I drawn to?

• What gives me the most joy in life?

• What is most important in life according to me?

• What are my desires regarding my future?

Summary

It is worth having courage and saying: “I am who I am. I have specific gifts and deficiencies, flaws and advantages, desires and aversions, which make me unique and unrepeatable. The Pope/priest/mom/grandma/animator inspire me, I admire them, but I don’t want to be the same as them. I want to be myself before God!”

Application and prayer

Before us is the evening prayer, during which we will call to the Holy Spirit with thanksgiving for those gifts that we have already received and with a request for what is needed for us, and what we have not yet discovered in ourselves.

Let us consider the questions from the previous point. Let us consider who we really are and who we want to be in relation with God. He is waiting for us and wants us to be authentic and happy before Him.

Let us pray with the text:

For this reason, because I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love toward all the saints, I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come. And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.

—Eph 1:15-23