Meeting 2. - To See the Horizon

Tags: Maturity, Freedom, Sin, Conversion, Working with text, Working with definition, Discussion, Formational

Goal

Didactic:

Participants become aware that despite numerous limitations, barriers, weaknesses they are able to rise above the walls, “climb the sycamore tree”, to see from it what they haven’t seen until now.

Educational:

From this perspective they should begin to change their life, treat it as a space for realizing their desires and transforming the world for the better, which is only possible after opening themselves to Jesus, entrusting Him with their weaknesses and setting out together with Him on the journey.

Introduction for the animator

Today’s meeting has two dimensions. On one hand it’s a kind of summary of what has already happened at the retreats - and much has happened, it constitutes a certain systematization of events, experiences and content. On the other hand it’s direct preparation for evening prayer, during which an exceptional meeting will take place - if we experience it well, it can become the most important one in our life.. A very important role during this group meeting is played by the animator’s testimony. If you feel in your heart that you need prayer for this, to testify in this direct way, turn to the prayer diakonia - they certainly won’t refuse you ;). We want to encourage participants to openness, to measure themselves with their own limitations in humility and with courage - first naming them, and then entrusting them to Jesus. It’s important to pay attention to the fact that we emphasize limitations and weaknesses not to stop at them, pick at wounds and focus on our own smallness. We name them to entrust them to God and go further. Kerygma doesn’t end at the second law of spiritual life. We want to testify that in life there’s no shortcut - Jesus comes to our life, but it depends on us whether we’ll go out to meet Him, it’s up to us to make a step forward, climb the sycamore tree despite our short stature to see more and better, to find ourselves at such a height that we’ll be able to see the horizon, be delighted by it and go further with this experience.

In the materials for animators at the end of the outline a longer text about self-limiting beliefs is placed. It’s worth familiarizing yourself with it before the retreats, so it will be easier for you to explain this concept to participants. This material is quite extensive, so don’t leave it for the last moment before the retreats - it’s good to stop for a moment over it. Also remember that the outline is help, not a rigid scheme that must be absolutely followed. Analyze it calmly and select those contents, those sharing questions, those materials that according to your discernment will be most appropriate for your group (if you don’t do this, your meeting may suddenly break off at the third point due to lack of time).

Prayer

Spontaneous to the Holy Spirit - calling for His light, which we need to stand in truth before God and each other, for courage to measure ourselves with our own limitations and openness of senses and hearts, so that we can be delighted by the landscape that will stretch before us when we rise above our walls.

Introduction to the meeting

A large part of the retreats is behind us. Much has happened, much we could already experience. Let’s share how we’ve used this time so far, testify to what God has accomplished in our hearts.

• How did I experience this time that’s already behind us?

• Which points of the retreats were especially important for me?

• Did I discover something new? Did something especially move me?

• Is there something that blocks me in fully experiencing this time? If yes, let’s share it and think together what we can do to change it.

• How did I fulfill the application from the last group meeting?

• How did I experience today’s Tent of Meeting? What Word especially reached my heart?

Yesterday’s evening prayer was a moment when we made a decision that we want to open ourselves to God’s love and accept it in our life. However, there are such spaces in our life that don’t allow this desire to be realized in full, to accept the full consequences of this decision. So today we want to think and concretely name everything that blocks us, limits us, makes us have a desire to go beyond our four walls, but it doesn’t come easily to us. Despite our “short stature” we want to try to climb above our walls.

• Can we recall situations from our life in which we very much wanted to do something, felt that if we don’t do it, we’ll lose some big and good opportunity, but something held us back from it?

• What were those situations? What was it that limited us? How did we feel then?

• What did we do to overcome those limitations? Did we ultimately succeed?

To dare to do something crazy

Let’s imagine the following situation. At school / at university a concert is organized for some occasion. Students perform at it. They have a lot of willingness and enthusiasm, but something doesn’t go quite as it should and the performance isn’t successful. Most likely the reaction of the surroundings, their colleagues will be mockery, ridicule and sharp criticism. But if you asked these people to dare to perform themselves in this concert, few would dare to do it.

• Are such situations something real for us? Have we encountered them? Let’s share this.

• Why do such situations occur in our life? Why is it so easy for us to stand aside and observe, evaluate and criticize, when we ourselves aren’t able to dare to do something risky?

There can be many reasons for such an attitude. Often people are guided by fear, they’re afraid to step forward, do something that might not work out, meet with criticism. Besides, an evaluating, critical attitude is very easy, comfortable and safe. It takes a lot of courage, work and effort to step forward along with accepting all its consequences.

• Can we name other situations in which people prefer to be onlookers rather than participants?

If the group doesn’t have many ideas, it’s good to suggest a few: people love romantic movies, but for them themselves the height of romance is taking their partner to such a movie; people complain about the Polish national soccer team, but they themselves wouldn’t dare to go out on the field; people complain that harm is being done, but they themselves won’t do anything to help others etc.

• What attitude do I adopt in life?

• To what extent can I be called a person who takes initiative, who when seeing that something is wrong, doesn’t wait with folded arms until it does itself, but takes up the challenge?

Let’s look at what attitude Zacchaeus adopted. Let’s read once more the Gospel fragment:

Then he entered Jericho and was passing through. And [there was] a man named Zacchaeus, a chief tax collector, and he was rich. He was trying to see who Jesus was, but he could not because of the crowd, since he was a short man. So running ahead, he climbed up a sycamore tree to see him, since Jesus was about to pass that way. When Jesus reached the place, he looked up and said to him, “Zacchaeus, come down quickly, for today I must stay at your house.” And he came down quickly and received him with joy. When they all saw this, they began to grumble, saying, “He has gone to stay at the house of a sinner.”

—Lk 19:1-7

• What position did Zacchaeus have in the society he lived in?

Zacchaeus was a chief tax collector - this is a very high position in society. Tax collectors (collectors of customs and taxes for the Romans) weren’t exactly liked in Palestine, but they certainly commanded respect.

• Let’s try to imagine such a socially respected person climbing a large tree. What reactions could this arouse?

A sycamore is a huge tree (you can show a photo for illustration). The sight of a short person trying to climb it must have been really comical. Taking into account that Zacchaeus held a high position, deciding on this he exposed himself not only to surprise from the people, but numerous mockery and ridicule.

• Why did Zacchaeus decide to do it anyway?

Here we can base on our intuitions - he must have been very strongly determined, he so much wanted to see Jesus (even if only curiosity guided him), that he risked, or such emotions guided him that he didn’t have time to “calculate” the consequences.

• What were the consequences? (“He has gone to stay at the house of a sinner.”)

• Can we point to examples of other people who in their life weren’t afraid to step forward, expose themselves to ridicule, because they wanted something more?

Here you can give various examples - biblical figures (St. Peter, St. Paul…), missionaries, special witnesses of faith, people fulfilling unusual dreams, passions. It would be ideal if we could find such people in our closest surroundings.

Above the walls

Each of us has some “short stature”, such spaces in life that block us, limit us, don’t allow us to go forward, though we very much would like to. Let’s try for a moment to look at these walls of ours, barriers - this is very important, because only when we notice something, will we be able to climb above it.

The animator presents the issue of self-limiting beliefs based on texts attached in materials for animators (at the end of the outline), which he studied before the meeting - you can choose one or two of the presented examples and briefly tell the group about them:

Our beliefs and the intensity

with which we believe in them determine

what we achieve in life.

The animator asks participants to create a list of beliefs about themselves that limit them, don’t allow them to realize important plans, desires, e.g. “I can’t impress anyone, because I always do everything too slowly”, “I’ll never learn to play the guitar”, “I’m not an interesting person, so I’d better not speak up”.

Note

Recommends for this purpose to fold an A4 sheet in half and write only on its left side.

A person has various barriers and limitations - physical, mental, ones they imposed on themselves, or ones that were in some way given to them by others. However, there is for all people one limitation that actually is what paralyzes us most and often is the source of other weaknesses. Let’s read a fragment of the letter to the Romans:

But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, though testified to by the law and the prophets, the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction; all have sinned and are deprived of the glory of God. They are justified freely by his grace through the redemption in Christ Jesus.

—Rom 3:21-24

• What does St. Paul write about human sinfulness?

• Am I aware that sin paralyzes me in action?

• In what way do I try to fight with this?

  Unfortunately most of us adults no longer have such a conviction that we could please God, that we really are for Him the most beautiful, most perfect and most desired creature. This is exactly how Satan deceives us, and we believe in his lie that our sins, weaknesses and baseness are something that defines our identity and future.”

  —Fr. A. Szustak – Donkey in Paradise

Sin is that element of our life that we’ll struggle with until the end of our stay on earth. It’s important to accept our sinful nature, but at the same time keep doing everything to fight these specific tendencies in ourselves. However, we ourselves won’t be able to deal with this.

Warning

It’s very important to appropriately explain this concept, so it’s not misunderstood by participants. Tendency to sin the CCC describes in the following way: “Man… urged on by the Evil One, already at the beginning of history abused his freedom”. He gave in to temptation and committed evil. He retains a desire for good, but his nature bears the wound of original sin. He became inclined to evil and prone to error: Man is inwardly divided. For this reason the whole life of people, whether individual or collective, presents itself as a struggle, and a dramatic struggle, between good and evil, between light and darkness.” (CCC 1707). Accepting one’s sinful nature means consent that my whole life is a struggle between good and evil, that on earth a process of conversion should still be taking place in us. I accept that I’m not perfect, at the same time still striving for this ideal and entrusting myself on this path to God. I must remember that I commit sins, sin is part of my identity, but doesn’t fill it completely.

Let’s read:

Three times I begged the Lord about this, that it might leave me, but he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. Therefore, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints, for the sake of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong.

—2 Cor 12:8-10

• Do I have some strong experience of overcoming my own weakness? A struggle after which I felt like a winner?

• In what situation did this take place? What did this struggle look like?

• What do I need to rise above my own limitations?

It’s worth doing some brainstorming here, a mind map and writing down everything that will be mentioned. At this point it’s necessary to return to the exercise about self-limiting beliefs - the animator asks participants to try to reformulate each of them in such a way that it shows possibilities and write their idea on the right side of the previously filled card, e.g.

1. “I can’t impress anyone, because I always do everything too slowly.” => “I perform my tasks calmly and thanks to this I can avoid mistakes and be precise.”

2. “I’ll never learn to play the guitar.” => “If I practice systematically, I’ll soon learn to play the guitar.”

3. “I’m not an interesting person, so I’d better not speak up.” => “I’m a unique and unrepeatable person, if I dare to speak up more often among other people, I’ll be able to show my interesting interior.”

It’s impossible to rise above the walls without Jesus - only He is able to not only overcome each of our weaknesses, but transform them into something good. It’s He who today stands by me and says that He wants to have dinner with me in my house. Jesus doesn’t want to snatch us from this world - He wants to enter our world, stop in it and remain in it with us. Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta expressed this perfectly (this text is in the notebook):

The same infinitely good and merciful God who takes care of you today will take care of you tomorrow and every following day. Either He will turn suffering away from you, or He will give you strength to endure it. Therefore keep calm and cast away from yourself all fear, fear and anxiety that your imagination suggests to you.

—Bl. Mother Teresa of Calcutta

To see the horizon

Let’s try for a moment to activate our imagination. Let’s close our eyes and try to recall an image of the horizon. You can use some visualization here - a nicely printed large format photo, presentation, video, as you see fit. You can also play participants a song by the band Raz Dwa Trzy:

Horizon is the act of connecting,

Azure with a piece of land,

And if one had to appreciate,

The malicious tenderness of instruments,

The goal is achievable from flight,

As a result of voyage or march,

Measured sequence of steps,

At an arbitrarily chosen time.

Distance from the horizon,

Inert due to assumptions,

Allows observers,

To acquire further illusions,

And change them into convictions,

That this place is a tangent,

The more one relies on it,

The same becomes closer.

Ref. Further than thought reaches,

Leading forward, footprints of feet.

Patiently tempting from afar,

Those who would like to get through,

Eternal in their own scale,

And extent of distance,

Horizon stands unmoved,

In the defenseless pupil of the eye,

Leaving hope,

Too great for one life.

—Raz, dwa, trzy – Further Than Thought Reaches

• What is this image like?

• What emotions does it arouse in me?

• Is this something unusual, exceptional, valuable for me?

• What characterizes the horizon?

The horizon is a “place” where sky touches earth - a beautiful and exceptional image. It can be treated as an allegory of our life, which we should live firmly treading on earth while always having before our eyes the perspective of heaven. It’s a vision that should constantly give birth in us delight.

• Do I have an experience of a situation in which initial difficulties, sufferings transformed into something good, which I perceive as fruit of God’s intervention?

• What was that situation?

• In what way did God transform difficulties into good?

Exceptional meeting

Meetings are an important element of our life. It’s hard for us to imagine life at all without exceptional people with whom we can meet, talk, experience good and valuable moments. Let’s try now to recall one exceptional meeting that was important enough for us that it stuck deeply in our memory. Let’s try using the table that’s in our notebooks to recall and write down elements that were most essential for us in this meeting:

• Who did I meet?

• When was it?

• Where?

• What did we do?

• Why was this meeting so important for me?

• Do I see fruits of this meeting today? What?

Jesus during His whole earthly life met many people - He stayed with them, talked, often accompanied them in the most prosaic and everyday activities, taught, healed. Let’s try to name several such meetings. Which are in our feeling especially exceptional? Let’s recall one of them:

While he was saying these things to them, an official came forward, knelt down before him, and said, “My daughter has just died. But come, lay your hand on her, and she will live.” Jesus rose and followed him, and his disciples followed him. A woman suffering hemorrhages for twelve years came up behind him and touched the tassel on his cloak. She said to herself, “If only I can touch his cloak, I shall be cured.” Jesus turned around and saw her, and said, “Courage, daughter! Your faith has saved you.” And from that hour the woman was cured. When Jesus arrived at the official’s house and saw the flute players and the crowd making a commotion, he said, “Go away! The girl is not dead but sleeping.” And they ridiculed him. When the crowd was put out, he came and took her by the hand, and the little girl arose. And news of this spread throughout all that land.

—Mt 9:18-25

• What happened during this meeting?

• How did the woman behave?

• How did Jesus treat her?

• Do I see some connection of this meeting with others we just named?

Every meeting of Jesus with a person is exceptional - each proceeds differently, each has a different effect. Jesus treats everyone individually (even when He heals, He does it differently each time). Exactly the same happens in our life. My relationship with Jesus is such as no one else has, my meetings with Him are unique and unrepeatable. Adventure with Jesus always begins with a meeting, dialogue. Exactly this will take place at today’s evening prayer. It’s good to prepare for this meeting, become aware what limitations, what smallness and weaknesses I want to entrust to Him so that He transforms them into unlimited possibilities.

Application

The only thing we can do with our limitations is to entrust them very concretely to Jesus. Let this be the application from today’s meeting. Let’s do this in individual prayer (you can during today’s adoration) beginning each time with the words: “In the name of Jesus, I renounce accepting as truth, that…”, and then entrusting Him with our possibility through expressing: “Jesus Christ, with You and for You I want to accept, that…” This is of course a proposal (because we’ve already come to the fact that every meeting with Jesus, every prayer is exceptional and unrepeatable).

Prayer

Praise of God in everything He accomplishes in us - in this time, which by His grace we can experience, in everything we’ve already experienced at these retreats and above all in all those limitations, to which He opened our eyes and which He wants to transform with His power.

Materials for animators

Note

Fragments come from publication: Niwiński T., 2011, I, that is how to change yourself, Gliwice: Złote Myśli.

Script about self-limiting beliefs - for the animator to familiarize themselves with before the meeting, so they can understand well themselves what they consist of and appropriately explain it to participants.

What is “self-esteem”?

The precursor of research on self-esteem is considered to be Californian psychologist, Dr. Nathaniel Branden. Self-esteem is, according to him, one of the more important aspects of human psychology, and also a key to human motivation. Two fundamental elements create self-esteem: “I can” and “I deserve”.

I can

The first element of self-esteem is awareness that I’m able to do something, achieve something. I’m able to obtain food, I’m able to build myself shelter, a house. I’m able to survive, develop, perfect and create. Unlike animals, man for survival must use his mind. Without it he would be exposed to enormous physical advantage of many predators. It’s exactly thanks to this mind that man achieved practically undivided domination on Earth. Man’s mind is therefore his most important tool of survival. People who can’t use their mind have very low self-esteem, don’t believe in their possibilities, and as a result achieve very little. On the other hand, people who believe in the possibilities of their mind and perfect it achieve much more. Awareness that they can count on their mind in difficult situations is extremely important in achieving anything. People who don’t know about the power of their own mind automatically place themselves in a losing position. Self-esteem is based on the ability to realistically assess possibilities of one’s mind and appreciate, realize how much this mind can achieve.

I deserve

The second element of self-esteem is awareness that I deserve. People who know that they deserve happiness in life, and believe that they deserve rewards for their action, usually gain these rewards. People who are internally convinced of their small value don’t have faith in themselves and automatically place themselves in a losing position from the start. This aspect of self-esteem was in history often used to manipulate people. By convincing a person how very wretched and imperfect a creature they are, a conviction develops that they don’t deserve rewards resulting from their work. Therefore it’s expected from them that they give the fruits of their work to those who manipulate them (and who only wait for this).

Externally controlled people, about whom was spoken in chapter 5, voluntarily give others the right to assess to what extent they deserve rewards offered by life. Regaining this right can occur through raising self-esteem. Reprogramming to “I deserve” cannot however be effectively done with ordinary propaganda, as is often observed in America. Learning to say “I’m brilliant” itself doesn’t solve the problem, if real abilities don’t hide behind it, that is “I can”. There must be balance between “I can” and “I deserve”.

It should be emphasized here that high self-esteem doesn’t mean conceit, on the contrary, conceit and superiority complexes are symptoms of low self-esteem and an attempt to compensate for its lack. Doctor Nathaniel Branden discovered that self-esteem isn’t an innate and unchangeable trait of man. It can be perfected and exercised, similarly as performing physical exercises develops muscles. Just as practically there’s no limit to developing one’s physical abilities, so the process of raising self-esteem has no limits. Each of us can constantly develop self-esteem, discovering increasingly interesting and beautiful aspects of our SELF. There’s no person who couldn’t benefit from developing “intellectual muscles”, it’s enough to understand what this phenomenon consists of and learn exercises that serve developing these “muscles”.

Self-limiting beliefs

How much our self-limiting beliefs can harm us is well illustrated by an example described by psychologists of a student in the United States, who was a very good student in school, but studies didn’t go well enough that after the first semester he was invited for a special conversation. It turned out that at the beginning of the year all students were subjected to the so-called S.A.T. test, whose goal is to determine learning abilities. “You can’t be surprised that my studies aren’t going well” — he said — “because my S.A.T. result is only 98. I simply don’t have abilities”. He was convinced that his intelligence quotient was measured, which at level 98 means abilities below average. When it was explained to him that this wasn’t an intelligence quotient, that result 98 is in percentages and means that he belongs to the group of 2% most able students, he immediately got to work and from then on had excellent results. Our beliefs and the intensity with which we believe in them determine what we achieve in life. Most people have possibilities of great achievements, but don’t achieve them mainly because they don’t believe it’s possible. Our life is often a reflection of beliefs we have. They say: “Fight for your beliefs, and they’ll be yours”. The rich become even richer, because they think about wealth and believe they are and will be rich. Poor people are poor, because poverty is what they mainly think about. As Jan Pietrzak says, in America unemployment in some families passes from generation to generation, through whole generations. Aren’t these people able? Certainly not, but their thoughts concentrate on unemployment, their life model looks like this.

Who limits us?

Earl Nightingale gives an example of a farmer who planted pumpkins and for fun covered one of them with a jar of elaborate shape. The pumpkin grew until it filled the tiniest corners of the jar. When harvest time came, the farmer broke the jar, and acquaintances wondered where this one pumpkin got such a strange shape from. Isn’t there someone around us who put such a jar, so we can only develop to a certain limit? Or maybe we ourselves voluntarily impose these limitations on ourselves?

I remember, when still being a student, I got a driver’s license, because there was an opportunity, but I didn’t drive a car for the simple reason that I didn’t have one. When my sister finally bought a small Fiat, I had an opportunity to show off my skills. Just in case my sister’s friend drove behind me in a second car. We’re driving, everything beautifully, but at some moment I see in the mirror that the friend is waving at me. I stopped the car, she stopped too. I get out, go to her: “What happened?”. And she says nothing, everything’s fine, she was just waving at me. So we drive further, but already I’m a bit embarrassed. After putting in first gear the car stalls. I say to myself: “Calmly”. Once more, it stalls again. The third time I start in first gear. I put in second — it stalls again. I’m getting more and more nervous, but I’m not giving up. Finally I’m driving in third gear. It’s strangely heavy somehow…

As it turned out later, I had habits from the start that were too good — getting out, I reflexively pulled the handbrake, only I forgot to release it later and drove half of Łódź on the handbrake! Similarly with self-limiting beliefs — you can live with them and you can even not notice that they’re braking us. It’s just a bit heavy to drive. Many people live with “handbrake pulled”. Next time someone complains to you that life is hard for them, look where they have the handbrake pulled.

“Good” memory

Many success teachers cite a story about training elephants in Africa, which is really very illustrative. When an elephant is young, they put a solid rope on its leg and tie it to a thick tree. The elephant pulls and pulls, but after some time learns that it can’t break the rope and stops trying. In this way it was programmed. Rope on the leg means that it’s tied and can’t move away from the tree further than it allows. It’s enough for such an elephant, when it grows up, to put a small rope on its leg and tie it to any small tree, and it won’t even try to free itself. Despite that with one pull of its elephant leg it could break the rope and break the tree, it won’t do it, because “good” memory from childhood tells it there’s no point in trying. We also have “good” memory. Often some failures from childhood paralyze us for our whole life. “I can’t”, “I must” and “I’m not able” were hammered into our heads for good. Do we take trouble to check our self-limiting beliefs? By unlocking self-limiting beliefs you can fundamentally change your life.

Release your brake yourself

Each of us has beliefs about ourselves or the world around us that aren’t true. Only very strong motivation in critical situations can change them. Successful people, who know this, constantly work on their beliefs and systematically remove self-limiting beliefs from their repertoire. Whenever we utter some statement, to others or especially in unceasing dialogue with ourselves, let’s think whether this isn’t by chance a self-limiting belief.

Law of expectation

Whatever we expect with conviction becomes our self-fulfilling prophecy. During the war a fortune teller predicted to my mother that she would have three children and that she would marry a second time. I remember that this fortune was often told at home, supposedly jokingly. I’m lucky to be the third child and parents didn’t have one more. After father’s death, being almost 70, mother married a second time, completely senselessly, because she immediately divorced. Did the fortune teller have the ability to predict the future, or did she sow in my mother’s mind a certain life plan? “Tereska is afraid of the doggy” seems to be an innocent poem, but my sister, Teresa, was panically afraid of dogs. It so happens that my wife, Teresa, is also afraid of dogs. There are people who always have flu in November — as if bacteria patiently waited for November and hyc — “didn’t I say?” — there’s flu. When seeing a black cat, do you expect misfortune? If yes, then according to the law of expectation, you can really expect misfortune! They say that if you believe you can do something, or if you believe you can’t, in both cases you’re right. Our minds in an amazing way cause events we expect to fulfill themselves. It only depends on us whether we’ll expect positive or negative events. The secret is to always expect what we want, and not what we don’t want.

Brilliant rats

“If the law of expectation is true, then why not check it on rats?” — someone might joke. It turns out it’s not a joke, because at Harvard exactly such an experiment was performed. Three groups of students trained three groups of rats in passing through a maze. They measured how quickly rats learned to find the shortest path through the maze to food. The first group of students was given a group of rats that were described as “brilliant”. They were supposed to have exceptional learning abilities. The second group of students received “average” rats, and the third — “mentally retarded” rats. During the experiment not only rats were observed, but above all students who trained them. It was noticed that students teaching “stupid” rats commented on their efforts to pass through the maze with statements like: “Well, where are you going, idiot”, “Move, slowpoke”, “Oh, you dimwit” etc. Meanwhile caretakers of “brilliant” rats stroked them and encouraged, using nicknames like “lightning”, “Einstein” or “speedy Gonzales”. Indeed, results in three groups were clearly different: “brilliant” rats learned fastest, then “normal” ones, and “stupid” rats performed worst. What’s strange about this? Above all that actually all rats were the same, and only students were informed that they have different abilities. The only difference between three groups were expectations of trainers

Brilliant students

Also at Harvard another experiment was done, this time in a large school. At the beginning of the year three teachers were invited and congratulated that they were distinguished as three best teachers in the whole school and in connection with this were invited to participate in a special experiment. In the coming school year three special classes were assigned to them, consisting of selected, outstanding students. To avoid protests from parents, the whole matter was to be kept in strict secrecy. The three chosen teachers had an excellent year. They stated that work with these special students was a real pleasure, their charges “were eager to learn”. Teachers also willingly devoted more time to them. These weren’t only their feelings, because objectively these three chosen classes achieved best results, not only in school, but in the whole district. What surprise it was for the three teachers when at the end of the year they learned from experimenters that their students really weren’t specially selected at all, and simply these were three average classes. “It’s hard to believe” — they stated — “but this means that these wonderful results were achieved thanks to us — best teachers in school”. It turned out that this time too they were misled — their names at the beginning of the year were simply drawn from a hat. Only expectations of these three teachers were different than the rest.

Expecting success

Parents expect various things from their children, bosses from employees, teachers from students, students from teachers. We expect various things from other people, but most important are our expectations towards ourselves!

Always expect the best from yourself.

Positive expectation from oneself has much greater influence on our life than we think. One of the most characteristic traits of successful people is expecting success. These people from the start imagine a favorable result and don’t allow thoughts of failure.